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Мужик после получки пьяный приходит домой. Утром, проспавшись, и ожидая упреков со стороны жены, сразу переходит в контрнаступление: - Жена! Ты мне пиджак почистила? - Почистила. - А брюки почистила? - И брюки почистила. - Ну а ботинки? - ...??? А чего их чистить, ведь там карманов нету!
На приёме у врача: - доктор, скажите, а можно ли кушать чернобыльские яблоки? - Да, но только огрызки надо поглубже закапывать.
Выпущен новый пылесос под названием "МОНИКА-2", отличается от других аналогичных машин особой силой всасывания.
Собрался международный конгресс по достижениям. Встают англичане и говорят: - Мы первые изобрели паровоз! А тут встают русские и говорят: - А ни фига! Первым паровоз изобрел Черепанов, наш, русский! Встают американцы: - Мы первые попали в космос. Русские им в ответ: - Первым в космос попал наш, русский - Гагарин. Встают японцы: - Мы первыми изобрели телевизор! Русские: - А вот и нет, первыми телевизор изобрели мы - в 1936 году! Встают итальянцы: - Мы первыми изобрели радио. Русские говорят: - Нет, радио изобрел Попов - русский ученый! Встают французы и говорят: - Мы первыми изобрели минет! Русские говорят: - А ни фига! Удивляются французы: Как так, мы точно первые! Русские: - А вот и нет! Еще царь Иван Грозный писал турецкому хану: "Хрен тебе в глотку и вижу я тебя насквозь!" Французы отвечают: - Ну, хрен в глотку - это, конечно, похоже на минет, а причем здесь "вижу тебя насквозь?" Русские: - А щас немцы встанут, скажут, что первые рентген изобрели, а вот и нет - накось, выкуси!!!
Новоназначенный сотрудник зашел в финансовый отдел впервые: - Вы главбух Иванов? - Да, а что? - Много слышал о Вас... - Да, но не можете доказать!
Ночь, спит муж с женой. Вдруг стук в дверь. Муж, матерясь, сонно одевается и идет к двери. Открыл, а там мужик стоит и говорит: - Слушай, мужик, толкнешь? Тот его и по маме, и по папе, в общем послал. Пришел в спальню, разделся, лег спать. Жена спрашивает, что там, ну он ей и рассказал. Но тут жена как давай пилить: - Конечно, он там один, в ночи, и никто не поможет, а как у самого машина сломается, не знаешь, что делать, пошел бы и помог доброму человеку. Ну, в общем, не выдержал мужик, оделся и пошел. Идет, в подъезде темно, он спотыкается, матерится. Выбрался на улицу, там тоже темнотища. Он и кричит: - Мужик, ты где? А тот: - Да я здесь, на качелях!!!!
Стоят двое новых русских на набережной в Венеции, вдруг смотрят - по воде плывёт презерватив. Один другому говорит: - Я понимаю, конечно, Венеция, каналы всякие, но как они на этих гандонах плавают?
Трехглавый змей Горыныч. Одна голова змея проснулась утром после вчерашней вечеринки, а перед носом бутылка водки. Она думает: выпью сама а им не скажу. Только пить, - а тут остальные две проснулись и говорят: - Что, как пить так одна, а как блевать - вместе?
Лучшая поза, когда занимаешься сексом с женой, это когда ты сзади, говорит один друг другому. Потому что не обязательно изображать довольную морду.
Друг приходит к доктору: Доктор: - Поработай за меня, мне уехать надо. Друг: - Я же не умею. - Ничего, придумаешь что-нибудь. На следующий день: - Ну как поработал? - Было у меня 3 пациента. 1-ый пришел говорит у меня запор, а я и не знаю что ему дать, дал пурген он сначала пошел потом побежал. Приходит 2-ой, говорит, у меня понос, а я и не знаю что ему дать. Дал пурген он сначала побежал, потом махнул рукой пошел. Приходит 3-ий: у меня насморк, я и не знаю, что ему дать, дал пурген - Ну... и что? - Да вон до сих пор сидит в углу - чихнуть боится...
Стоит грузин на горе с бумерангом. Подходит к нему другой и говорит: - Слушяй Гоги, что это такое? Гоги: - Не знаю. - Тогда выкинь! Гоги: - На, сам выкидывай.
Читает как-то Новый Русский своему сыну сказку на ночь: - ...И уехал так колобок от бабы и от деда на своём новеньком "Мерсике"... - Пап, так у колобка рук и ног не было! Чем он управлял? - Да хрен его знает. Ну, допустим, банком...
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Counter-top frames in 6 min's and 31 seconds, garage from his chest slightly next point position held up the ball, the index finger in addition to middle finger instinct to uncover gaps in the rubber ball center. His arm gently lifted back, left his palm the baseball, but still control concerning his fingers. His right arm into all of the joints is close to be able to 90 degree Angle, on the shoulder to the knee, from the elbow to the wrist, from wrist to talk about, as if a diner waiter in carrying some sort of tray.
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Total play, scored 28 points 6 rebounds and 10 assists inside Treasury, 6 of 11 three-point kevin durant shoes|kd shoes photographs. 24 points and 3 rebounds, a couple of assists, Owen has scored 17 points from the first half, he scored seven points from the second half. Facing the big four in the mighty, and only Michael Owen in one-on-one acquire garage have chances, but today's garage to try and do better.
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The garage He the many 3-pointer this season, you'll find 105 of 3 is not sending (272), put simply, is to create prospects, nasty sto vote. This trick inside team's star, such while flow of harden, vladimir radmanovic, kobe Bryant, Paul, but often because a person errs, physical strength ingestion, to the number of times few, and the hit ratio is just not high. But obviously is an exception in the Treasury, his three-point shot 105 times seriously isn't assists quantity highest within alliance,stephen curry shoes even better when compared with lebron James thrown in more all 3-pointers, and also the shooting is in a new league all five like not assists free-throw shooting players on the fifth (41. 8%), the two quality and quantity. Obtained together, the three points to thrown into space seriously isn't an easy thing, will need to have the forty percent three-point shots need to create his own images, this how tired! By far the most precious is, no subject when and where, and how to make simple moves, garage has a higher percentage. It is no wonder the manager of the a warrior when Bob myers not too long ago told the Associated Mass media said: "as long seeing that it's garage, to obtain the ball is reasonable. inches.
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Table frames in 6 a few minutes and 31 seconds, garage from his chest slightly next point position organized the ball, the index finger in addition to middle finger instinct to locate gaps in the rubber ball center. His hand gently lifted back, still left his palm the baseball, but still control involving his fingers. His right arm into the many joints is close to 90 degree Angle, through the shoulder to the knee, from the elbow to the wrist, from wrist to refer to, as if a eating place waiter in carrying a tray.
Glen Davis clippers, 289 - pound ahead, curry shoes need to speed up their action from the Treasury, since the childhood to lay a solid foundation for complete to garage in different state, the right arm and shooting can keep perfect posture and toughness. And in addition to master hand movements, garage features a precise shot needed another factor: enough deep muscle mass memory. Shooting touch seriously isn't a proper adjective, anybody player, able to throw a great shooting there is however one secret to all - every single day, year after year exercise, until a set regarding complex dynamic chain implanted into your muscle mass. Garage never resist for instance monks meditate boring training, it also helped whenever he graduated from high school graduation, eventually grow into some other leading little-known Davidson higher education NCAA elite last nine.
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Garage into seven three-pointers inside the game, this also let his or her playoff three-pointers hit number as much as 261, match the Robert horry, ninth three points in playoff record list. Distance comes eighth Chauncey billups, he furthermore only six three items.
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11 three-point brand out hand, hit kevin durant shoes several goals, including vast distances of three points. Wearing warriors baseball hat sitting in the stands to watch the particular old garage, it also appears to have son's playing god look like some incredible performance. The lens on the old garage, he could not help but shook their head.
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12-13 year to contrast the shed and ray Allen throughout '05 -' 06 - Allen into 269 3-pointers, and he could be the Seattle supersonics. That year, Allen's 269 connected with 653 three-point shots, chance 41. 2%, as Stephen - 272 of 600 shots in his Arsenal, as high as 45. 3%; That year, Alan ball attack create 3 ratio is a lot less than a quarter, compared using 38. 6% in databases; That year, Allen's assists the amount 3. 7, less as opposed to Treasury for three assists. So the outline, the image of alternative 3-pointers hand straight down the garage outline: he not merely completed the sharpshooter background, his teammates for his / her creation of free-throw prospects into; He will also look for opportunities at the same time, through the ball discovery, stopped for no helps 3-pointer of shots. Additionally, he also can complete assists, "create" another pitcher - clay - Thompson! Not simply can catch vote, will urgent stopped, can generate more opportunities to other people, this star, unique! I am kd shoes afraid, just use "striker" two words happen to be unable to define Stephen curry, should be in with the "great" rhetoric.
"I got utilized to my evaluation, " curry were recalled,kevin durant shoes "people said I has been too short, don't play college basketball, then for that same reason that I am unable to play in the NBA. People don't even think I can play protect, then said I am not only a pure point guard, until October of not too long ago, I also found that this general manager of funny if you ask me as the league third good shooting guard. We've not yet fully play their full potential, well, i set a higher typical to himself, committed to continuously improve for being more outstanding. "
"We've never met having it . curry shoes him so great shooting everywhere, " warriors coach draw Jackson said, "and roll, stop and go empty-handed, hook hand, step back, lower-leg, in the face associated with two double forced to be able to......, any thought of firing mode, you can see he or she is astonishingly. We have certainly not seen anyone can attain this level, his Steve Nash (microblogging) played a high level, the two-time MVP honor, shooting is incredible, but it is equally a level. And the other like reggie miller, Chris mullin, such while dell and I enjoyed together - Ellis, dell -- Arsenal, they are most fantastic striker, but many people didn't garage so detailed, this guy is simply no limit. "
Timer as well as dance, 6 minutes stephen curry shoes in addition to 30 seconds, Davis is doing everything we can to near to the garage, but still overdue step. Garage again to accomplish a beautiful jumper - it isn't strictly jumper, his toe will be out from the ground, under the condition with the body is still climbing, use forefinger and middle finger touch to finish the hand. Treasury entire body slightly back. This not only makes his moves even more difficult to block, as well as relating to the ball and floor a great additional 10 degrees Position. NBA players to period takes 0. 6 seconds usually, the garage from arranging action to dial your ball moves, it solely takes 0. 4 mere seconds. Fast to make up with the deficiency of the car port height, the ball well pun intended, the opponent blocking fly toward the basket in the process, the look of garage is definitely along with them. His arm still moves if the posture, and of his / her teammates has begun for you to pose three gestures...
Knight's strategy clearly, today is for you to cling to garage, will not give him any possibility, and Kevin durant is always one-on-one with defense. But garage or under heavy defensive search for opportunities, such as experience stephen curry shoes low, he mobilized, make use of the other fear his perimeter ability garage easily have scored two points.
The last 80 seconds in the first half, durant overlooked shots from outside, the basket three players are generally knights, including Thompson, lebron, as a result, the Treasury rushed in the basket from the prolonged position, unexpectedly the offensive rebounds inside the knight encirclement! Then they points ball durant, whom finished scores!
And the 2nd half, knight to defensive strategy seems to be shaken, they don't have too much double again, help, interestingly, JR in 1 about 1 against Arsenal, and directly put this garage was pushed to the ground.
Sure enough, this knight defensive shaken curry shoes immediately after scoring started rising throughout his Arsenal, outside his 3-pointer by continuous, in those days he was given the opportunity to just like Kevin durant got chance from the first half. After three points from the database is still hit, he this section one bomb beneath 14 points.
Today is actually June 1, the time kd shoes may be the international children's day, it seems in the "primary school" is one of the holiday today.
Small garage finish I rested the vast majority of holiday to battle, they are still the contribution towards the brilliant stroke, but additionally pass a 3-pointer by simply Kevin durant. The past 3 minutes, garage off ahead of schedule, because the online game had no suspense.
From brought the first curry shoes baseball, a garage at this match: each other laid out a perfect diamond top, teammate Steve Blake flew to follow along with up, left the clippers safeguard darren collison (microblogging) the gap between two steps at the rear of their closely, Danny granger could be the only defender in pull. This is the shed superior court intuition and and the embodies: his shot choice. He seems to recognize the defensive player with the ideas, can predict their particular next move, then strike ahead of time. "When other people usually are doing gesture, garage within judgment, and the video game, this is Stephen is the greatest place, in this respect the league may be an awesome experience. Find field space, know in which the defense space will arise, it is the key on the art of his shots. Because no matter precisely how good your shots, more exquisite technology, no space is useless. "ESPN's Mark thorpe, once wrote in his article.
Garage very carefully stephen curry shoes observing the defense, he have reason to be therefore cautious. Before this, the warriors have overlooked 12 goals in 13 shots before, is now 33 for you to 37 behind the clippers, disturbed because of the right leg muscle pressure of garage after only 1 of 4. For car port himself, this ball is critical: before a season, he hit an increasing in NBA history together with 272 grains of about three points, if again recognized three points today, his three points there is much surprise hit number will meet or exceed 200 mark. So that library will end up the sixth in a row has at least two season hit 200 grains of three participants, at the same occasion, still can have about three points to continuous hit game streak keep 54 games - will probably be the warriors team background record.
"I like everything kevin durant shoes linked to the shooting, " garage once said in a interview, "but with the best especially in perfect give posture. When your person is in good rhythm, from standing in the feet on the ground, his hands to complete a trial, all series of joint actions will be calm and smooth, including waves. It's a fantastic feeling. ".
Garage within the stephen curry shoes second dribbling is toward the turn on the left side with the body without any slowdown, their footsteps choiceness and quickly, soon arrived at the position you need to go. Unlike most pitcher like the biggest market of gravity down, then struggled to jump to complete, the garage action much more concise. Don't waste any time and effort, just jump off the earth, slightly triggered his taking pictures action instantly. "He is not only probably the most pure great scorer, he even gave shot two words for making the definition, the full shooting art played the revolutionary role. "The bobcats brain scout work Adam : Mr Libby said Treasury.
Counter frames in 6 a few minutes and 31 seconds, garage from his torso slightly next point position organized the ball, the index finger along with middle finger instinct to discover gaps in the plastic ball center. His hand gently lifted back, quit his palm the soccer ball, but still control among his fingers. His right arm into all of the joints is close in order to 90 degree Angle, in the shoulder to the elbow, from the elbow on the wrist, from wrist to make reference to, as if a bistro waiter in carrying some sort of tray.
Glen Davis clippers, 289 - pound before, curry shoes need to speed up their action in the Treasury, since the childhood to lay an excellent foundation for complete to garage in a state, the right arm and shooting can keep perfect posture and power. And in addition to perfect hand movements, garage incorporates a precise shot needed one more factor: enough deep muscles memory. Shooting touch is not a proper adjective, anyone player, able to throw a fantastic shooting there is however one secret to all - 7 days a week, year after year process, until a set associated with complex dynamic chain implanted into parts of your muscles. Garage never resist for instance monks meditate boring practice, it also helped when he graduated from high school, eventually grow into a separate leading little-known Davidson school NCAA elite last 8.
"Game changing, there is no time to kevin durant shoes you see your own shooting action is correct, " curry explained, "you can only depend on their daily at working out ground building muscle ram, hit and believe that people can. We're so many practice in training, so that you can the game, you can depend on instinct to react. But if it is not in the correct way, the game will really feel very strange. ".
Garage, 26, is one kd shoes of the largest child, dell -- garage in 2002, his or her dad announced over 07 years of career, finally paid 40. 2% on threes survey card. From a extremely young age, Stephen about the shooting learned how to shoot on the feet of the master, when dad refused for taking him to the hornets coaching, Stephen will be pursed jaws, not because can't visit those big-name players, the old you are, but because he also desire to be with my dad, to rehearse his shot.
At age 9, garage is of his very own stephen curry shoes amateur league teams of players, only if the coach must outside shot collapse in the opponent's zone will possibly be sent. Recalled the oneself, garage proudly said: "when My partner and i was a defense specialists, all start from presently there. "
To go back to curry shoes the original text, once the garage near the basketball in midfield, people tend to overlook essentially the most important thing: pool baseball skills. Sonya, thanks in order to his mother, then a new 5 feet tall 3, cordial and some stubborn woman again as well, she was in school played point guard, turning to the volleyball after into your campus of Virginia technological, and meet the car port there's father. "If I dribble towards coast, I have to settle on to shoot or go, it's my limit. "Dell claimed, "people started for Stephen impression is all the guy can beautiful posture hit pictures, but before becoming a striker, he already was an even better control player, people have a tendency to ignore it. After his or her dribble shot, is I the most wonderful moments. Thanks to his mother. ".
From a brought the first curry shoes golf ball, a garage at the particular match: each other spelled out a perfect diamond front, teammate Steve Blake flew to follow along with up, left the clippers guard darren collison (microblogging) the length between two steps driving their closely, Danny granger is the only defender in tow line. This is the garage superior court intuition and understanding that embodies: his shot collection. He seems to realize the defensive player on the ideas, can predict the next move, then strike early in advance. "When other people are doing gesture, garage with judgment, and the activity, this is Stephen is the greatest place, in this respect this league may be second to none. Find field space, know the place that the defense space will occur, it is the key from the art of his photographs. Because no matter how good your shots, much more exquisite technology, no place is useless. "ESPN's David thorpe, once wrote in his article.
Garage with great care stephen curry shoes observing the defense, he also have reason to be therefore cautious. Before this, the warriors have have missed 12 goals in 13 shots during the past, is now 33 to be able to 37 behind the clippers, disturbed by the right leg muscle strain of garage after only one of 4. For car port himself, this ball is important: before a season, he hit accurate documentation in NBA history having 272 grains of several points, if again founded three points today, his three points this season hit number will exceed 200 mark. So that library will end up the sixth in a row has no less than two season hit 200 grains of three participants, at the same occasion, still can have three points to continuous hit game streak carry on and 54 games - it's going to be the warriors team history record.
"I like everything kd shoes in connection with the shooting, " garage once said in an interview, "but with the greatest especially in perfect hand posture. When your is in good rhythm, from standing in the feet on a lawn, his hands to complete a shot, all series of joint actions is going to be calm and smooth, like waves. It's a superb feeling. ".
Shed, 26, is one kd shoes of the largest child, dell -- garage in 2002, his / her dad announced over 16 years of career, finally paid 40. 2% on threes survey card. From a quite young age, Stephen across the shooting learned how to shoot on the feet of the get better at, when dad refused to consider him to the hornets education, Stephen will be pursed mouth area, not because can't go to see those big-name players, the old you happen to be, but because he also desire to be with my dad, to rehearse his shot.
At age 9, garage is of his or her own amateur league teams involving players, only if the coach has to outside shot collapse on the opponent's zone will become sent. Recalled the yourself, garage proudly said: "when I was a defense specialists, all start from right now there. "
To go returning to the original text, if the garage near the soccer ball in midfield, people tend to overlook just about the most important thing: pool basketball skills. Sonya, thanks to be able to his mother, then a 5 feet tall 3, cordial and some stubborn woman again while doing so, she was in secondary school played point guard, looking towards the volleyball after into the campus of Virginia technical, and meet the car port there's father. "If I dribble to the coast, I have to settle on to shoot or complete, it's my limit. "Dell stated, "people started for Stephen impression is all he'll beautiful posture hit photographs, but before becoming the striker, he already was an even better control player, people tend to ignore it. After his / her dribble shot, is I the most amazing moments. Thanks to the mother. ".
Car port, 26, is one kd shoes in the largest child, dell - garage in 2002, the dad announced over 16 years of career, finally paid 40. 2% on threes document card. From a quite young age, Stephen throughout the shooting learned how to shoot on the feet of the learn, when dad refused to take him to the hornets instruction, Stephen will be pursed mouth area, not because can't visit those big-name players, the old you might be, but because he also wish to be with my dad, to apply his shot.
At the age of 9, garage is of his or her own amateur league teams connected with players, only if the coach must outside shot collapse for the opponent's zone will always be sent. Recalled the ourselves, garage proudly said: "when We was a defense specialists, all start from right now there. "
To go to the original text, once the garage near the golf ball in midfield, people tend to overlook the most important thing: pool basketball skills. Sonya, thanks to help his mother, then a 5 feet tall 3, cordial and some stubborn woman again at the same time, she was in senior high school played point guard, turning to the volleyball after in the campus of Virginia support, and meet the storage there's father. "If I dribble on the coast, I have to settle on to shoot or pass, it's my limit. "Dell mentioned, "people started for Stephen impression is all he can beautiful posture hit shots, but before becoming the striker, he already was a much better control player, people tend to ignore it. After his or her dribble shot, is I the most wonderful moments. Thanks to his or her mother. ".
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