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Анеки
Две девушки:
- Ну как тот вчерашний красавчик с дискотеки?
- Да ну его, дурак.
- А что так?
- Ну делаю я ему минет. Минуту делаю, 2, 3, 10, а он все никак не кончает. Ну делаю еще 10, тут он как-то корчиться и извиваться начинает. Ну, думаю, щас, только не в меня... Но нет же, не выдал. Еще 5 минут жесткого минета, у него дикие судороги, и тут он выдает фразу, от которой я ему чуть член не откусила:
"Дорогая, ты уже кончила? А то я больше терпеть не могу..."

Едет в машине грузин с женой, жене приспичело по нужде.Ну он остановил машину и жена побежала в кусты.Вдруг дикий крик и из кустов выскакивает она а за ней бежит другой грузин с хозяйством наружу.Ну муж ,ясно дело закричал:
-Эй,ты чего.
-Это твой жена?
-Мой!!
-Вай,вай ,а я думал дикий.

Один приятель говорит другому:
- Вчера совершил затяжной прыжок с парашютом.
- Что прям сразу затяжной?! Ты ж просто так прыгнуть-то не мог.
- Просто так не мог. А разок затянулся и прыгнул.

Ревнивый муж рассматривает командировочные фотографии жены.
- А кто это сфотографировал тебя в сауне почти без ничего?
- Да это Маринка из восьмого отдела...
- Какой еще Маринка???

В тире конкурс на лучший выстрел.
Побеждает маленький мальчик.
Ему вручают черепашку.
На следующий день он снова побеждает и ему дарят плюшевого медвежонка.
Он спрашивает:
- А можно, как вчера, пирожок с мясом и хрустящей корочкой?

Праздник 8 марта. Мужики из цеха решили поздравить открыткой своего бригадира "Дорогой Иван Петрович, сердечно поздравляем вас с праздником 8 марта!.. " После работы И. П. подходит к мужикам в раздевалку.
- Мужики, вы что, совсем офигели?! Меня с бабским праздником поздравлять! Что я вам баба какая-то?
- Баба, не баба, но сцука ты приличная!
e107 дата 18.11.2005 - 10:16:28 Читать/Комментить: 15отпавить с помощью email кому-нибудь для печати

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